The character gods were testing me yesterday and I failed miserably!
I took the day off yesterday so I could attend graduation practice in the afternoon and make it to graduation early. Although an AA is not a degree that is given at a Cal State or
UC, it was still a precious moment to me and I was thrilled to be taking part in the ceremony.
As I got ready for practice, I got a call from my doctor. His voice already told me he
didn’t have the best of news for me. He said that my biopsy came back, I
didn’t have cancer, but they could not rule it out either. I have Follicular Cells, which I goggled later and its cells in the thyroid, but other website said Follicular cancer is an aggressive cell (which I don’t have, but I am assuming for the time being that the cells can turn to it.) I know, I know… I should have asked while on the phone, but I was too shocked to even think of questions. I have a follow up appointment with him in two weeks, at which time I will ask all the questions that came up after I hung up. Can you think of any thing that I should ask?
I will need to have surgery to remove the two nodules and any others they find when they open me up. When they open me up, if my thyroid glad has cancer, they will remove it completely. After surgery, regardless if they only take the nodules or the entire gland, I will need to take thyroid medication for the rest of my life. I made the appointment to see the surgeon for my consultation which is 3 weeks out.
Hind sight, I would have gone to graduation practice or taken a walk before calling anyone. I was an emotional mess and the first thing I did was call Jay. He
didn’t pick up, so I called my Mom. As I started to tell her what the doc said, I burst into an emotionally basket case! Who gives calls like this??? Well, I did. I felt horrible when my Mom emailed me later that her heart was trembling! I called Jay before leaving and was again a mess!
Like they say, bad things come in 3, so there was hit #1 for the day.
So off I went, like I should have to graduation practice. It was bright and sunny when I left for practice, so much so that I worn a tank top, shorts and flip flops. Graduation was being held at my old high school’s tack and field (outdoors) and practice was being held at the very spot I would be seating that night. Right as they started with announcements the wind picked up, the sunny skies became replaces with grey clouds. The rain gods soon started to pour on our practice and we
didn’t get to practice our precession. I got home and guess what? My period started a week and half EARLY! It’s as if my body was an emotional mess, too! So that is hit #2 of the 3 bad things that day!
It was eerie after I got home. I spoke to Cindy on the phone and after that it was dead silent! No emails, texts, phone calls... nothing! I was just there at my house working away on schoolwork with the only noise coming from the thunder and rain. Finally, as I was taking off to graduation calls started pouring in. It was one call after another, literally! It’s funny how my mind works, but when it gets that silent and I can’t get a hold of someone, I think God came and I am left alone on earth.
On campus there was the same eerie feeling. There was no one in sight. The parking lot I parked at was completely empty, except for my car. I finally turned the corner in the middle of campus to see life, tons of grads around the cafeteria (a place we were not supposed to meet up at). That’s were I got hit #3 from the 3 bad things of the day… graduation had been cancelled due to the rain. WHAT THE F%&@! At practice they told us if it was raining, that the ceremony would be held at the school gym, but I guess they didn't plan ahead for it.
There was a line to take pictures with the school president and another line to get out commemorative pin and diploma cover. I made the call/texts to everyone with the news, took my picture and got in line for my diploma cover. I was thinking that they would just give us the cover and I would be on my merry way. But
noooooo.... Someone had a bright idea to make us actually wait over 30 minutes standing in a crowded cafeteria (
cuz the reception was being held there, too) to confirm our diplomas and to hear one of the student speeches (that we couldn't even hear or care about at this point!)
I was in a foul mood. My sister and brother-in-law were still on there way and my Mom later called me and made her way to campus with my niece, too. That made me in a better mood.
While in line my sister and bro-in-las found me and gave me ballons, flowers and a card.
This is what it said…
Remember What is Most Important…
It’s not having everything go right; it’s facing whatever goes wrong.
It’s not being without fear; it’s having the determination to go on in spite of it.
What is most important is not where you stand, but the direction you’re going in.
It’s more than never having bad moments; it’s knowing you are always bigger than the moment.
It’s believing you have already been given everything you need to handle life.
It’s not being able to rid the world of all its injustices; it’s being able to rise above them.
It’s the belief in your heart that there will always be more good than bad in the world.
Remember to live just this one day and not add tomorrow’s troubles to today’s load.
Remember that every day ends and brings a new tomorrow full of exciting new things.
Love what you do, do the best you can, and always remember how much you are loved”
It was exactly was I needed to hear!
Two classmates from chem, Matt & Natalie, came too!
And then I cam home to these two loves!
The night ended good!