On a brighter note... I decided to run a half marathon in 3 weeks. It's totally out of the blue. Kinda. It's one that I have been wanting to do and I think about often. I told myself in November, if it wasn't sold out I would sign up. I didn't sign up. Then I told myself that same thing aftermy 2 pay days. Finally I did sign up after talking to my sister Jess about really wanting to do it. I haven't trained. It's on my bday weekend and if I run that one and another in May, then I get another cool medal because I complete this challenge. I know it's ridiculous that I would pay up the wazoo to run, but I guess there are worst things to spend my $ on. Plus, I notice I am happier when I work out. I have been making small goals here and there. My most recent one is to run 8 miles within 60 mins. Yesterday, I came close to my goal and that made me smile.
I've been bummed lately. I was hoping to find a full-time job with great
benefits right after graduating. I started applying to government agencies a
few months before my last quarter. Unfortunately, for government jobs there are
tons of people who apply and some job postings are open because the agencies
has to run the position even though they might be hiring within. I am getting a
lot of reject letters that the position has been filled, canceled or I was not
selected to move forward. I miss the days when getting an interview was much
easier. I am used to being a shoe in after the interview, but nowadays it feels
impossible to get my foot in the door.
I went to a test a few months for this one position. At the test they said
the anticipated an opening in 6 months, so this test was just to have an eligibility
list ready to go for quicker selection process if the opening occurs. I thought
that was extremely inconsiderate! I had my hopes up high and so did so many
others for a possibility half a year later?
I really, REALLY want to pursue working in a crime lab or investigating
crimes as a forensic technician. If I get into that I want to become an
entomologist. Knowing the insect life cycles and being able to determine time
of death based on insects fascinates me. However, I don't want to jump into
taking a bunch more classes just to end up in a non-related field.
Today I took another test for another position. I walked away feeling
hopeful...
I also went to an interview about 3 weeks ago. I had just finished a graveyard
shift and wasn't feeling my best. I literally was dragging my feet to go
because the bed seemed to be calling my name. I went through and did okay. Surprisingly,
I received a letter that I was going to the next level and was currently ranked
#1. That did boost my spirits which needed much boosting.
I'm now having a regret. I didn't apply for the full-time position at my
work. The reason I didn't apply was because it's a position working for the
State. We are having a huge budget crisis and employees here get a raise every
6-8 years. Two other part-timers were applying and I knew they wanted to work
here and would be here for quite some time. Me on the other hand would be here
for a short period and would be unhappy about my pay. Hindsight, I could've
worked on a second Bachelors or my Master's degree. The state allows for
college tuition assistance in the CSU system. But I wasn't thinking of what is
best for me; instead I was thinking what was best for my co-workers and
employer. *shoot me*
Nothing I can do about it now. Only think "well it wasn't meant to
be!" Another door will open.
